A Whole New World

Chains of Promathia did a good job of keeping us in the same continent. It was awesome to see new parts of the world you've grown familiar to.

But then. All of a sudden.

Treasures of Aht Urhgan.

It was a whole new continent. With whole new shits to murder. This was huge.

Well, not huge. But really big.

One look at the map could tell you this was going to be a long drawn-out expansion with tons to do. Which wasn't a bad thing. I loved new quests and areas to explore. But that also meant the expansion might be 25%-30% new endgame stuff that I probably wouldn't do for a long time. Or ever.

I read and reread the manual that came with my PS2 copy. The new beast tribes looked fucking bad ass. Lamia, which all looked like 1980's harem Medusa. Mamool Ja, giant lizards with bobbly penis heads. Big ass Trolls, which looked like trolls. And Qiqirn, those adorable little racist stereotypes.

The latter three would also periodically attack Aht Urghan Whitegate, the entrance to the main city, in a fucking huge battle called Besieged, which I will go into greater detail in another entry because I do what I want.

Also, guys! New jobs!

Yes, this expansion brought the jobs Corsair, Puppetmaster and Blue Mage. All of these jobs looked interesting. Especially Corsair. Man, all that frilly armor looked... Gay, I'm not gonna lie.

But the fact that Corsair was continuously called a pirate piqued my interest. Enough that one of the first things I did was unlock Corsair.

So fucking frilly. Kill me now.

That's better. Sorry, Darios. Sometimes collateral damage is necessary.

After attaining Corsair, I quickly learned it was as much a pirate as San d'Oria was my favorite place to visit. In case that went over your head: it wasn't.

Yes, they got a gun and hat. And the name. But that's the extent of their piratism. I never once plundered ships or made British soldiers walk the plank. I did get plenty of booty, but that was just my regular routine.

Quick: what's the first thing you think of when I say "Pirate"?

Did you say "Cards?" Good! Because that's what Corsair had. It's main ability was cards.

Shiny cards that spun around. Probably to distract party members from the fact that you were doing shit damage. And probably just staring at a Mithra's ass.

And everything was expensive as hell. You had to use dice to obtain abilities (like you do), which you couldn't get anywhere except a vendor, who sold them for regular vendor-inflated prices. Then bullets were still fucking expensive. And your Quick Draw abilities cost different cards plus bullets. Fucking shit, SE. It's like you actually WANT people to buy gil.

But all that aside, Aht Urhgan was a solid expansion with tons to do and a new hub city that turned Jeuno into a ghost town. Which wasn't a bad thing. It was actually one of my wishes from the very beginning. Only difference was the whole "expansion" thing and not "Elvaan-seeking nuke."

Try to be snooty when you're dead, bitches.

Spoiler: Elvaan actually can.