Drunk Gaming

You guys ever play FFXI drunk?

Really?

Could have fooled me. Everyone plays like they're drunk. Or retarded.

Or retardidly drunk.

I used to play drunk, and I was hilarious. At least, from what I remember.

I'm drinking right now, and everything I type is gold.

Fuck sausage boobs.

I still indulge in ones that are cold while I raid in XIV. It's the only way I can get through my alliance not knowing what to do and everyone associating me with Team Retard.

I'm drunk and I can still follow boss mechanics, you losers. Not as drunk as I can be, but as drunk as I have to be.

Back in my Valkrum days, I used to drink. A lot. I used to go in with a job at 11, get blackout drunk, and wake up with a job at 20, all my equipment unequipped, an inventory full of sand, and four people on my blacklist. Also the screams over my speakers somehow.

Still can't forget. The screams... The screams...

But there was this one guy. This one dude that made me look sober. I'm pretty sure he was drunk all the time. He hung out in the Dunes, so I don't blame him.

His name was Buddogweiser. And this guy was a riot.

From what I remember, he was a monk with the typing ability of your modern Tumblr user.

I don't think I understood a single word he said. I'm not sure what was up with him, but everything was misspelled and grammatically incorrect.

But not in an annoying way. I never wanted to punch him in the face or call him a retard.

He was genuinely a really cool guy, and we hung out a lot. Talking nonsense and protecting random parties from goblin trains.

Then he just disappeared. He either quit, or the Dunes finally swallowed him whole like so many n00b hopes and dreams.

If anyone knows what happened to him, direct him to this blog please. I'd like to see that unintelligible jibberish one last time.

Stay thirsty, my friends.