The graphics are decent, but the main story is crap.
Did you know that retro gaming stores still exist? They sure do, and this is about one of them!
I was at a local mall because my girlfriend wanted something. A hat maybe, I'm not sure. She always wants something.
We walk past shops with stuff, very uninteresting stuff. When I spot it. Spawn Point Gaming.
I salivate, for this is my realm, and in it, I am king.
Walking closer, I see a big suit of Halo guy armor out front, and I start having PTSD flashbacks. I catch myself before fainting and head in. My body is surrounded by games.
Very, very overpriced games.
I go to the "retro" section, which I put in quotations because "retro" has a very vague meaning these days. Not only did the "retro" section have various Atari, NES, and Genesis titles, it also consisted of PS1 and PS2.
My body now feels old and decrepit.
As I scanned the shelves, my eyes filled with tears at all the titles I loved had been reduced to "retro" status.
Then this came up, and I was filled with rage.
Just the disc. It doesn't even come with a hard drive that you can place upon your mantle and tell your grandchildren war stories about how you breached the retard lines at the Battle of Valkurm.
I wanted to tell the guy at the register this must be a huge, world-altering mistake, but he was very busy in a meeting with General Tso, so I decided its best to leave it be.
Catching a glimpse of the military commander's eyes, I saw fear. Which was not surprising because, as everyone knows, General Tso's chicken.
*hold for laughter and wild applause*
Before leaving, I looked around the store for a Brady guide as well, because that would have been hilarious to do a few blogs on, but to no avail.
As a side update to my real life quest of finding old friends, I am currently in stasis, awaiting response from someone who could possibly crack this case wide open.
I will keep you readers posted. Until then, stay frosty.
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